Posts Tagged: pastor

Dave (personal) — 2 Comments
27
Jan 09

Are you an innie or an outtie?

Okay, so save your response if you are about to educate me on your belly button :) You should know by now that topics here on my blog go much deeper than that…ha, ha :D

I recently tweeted about needing some coffee after a short night of sleep, and ended up engaging in a dialog with @djchuang that caused me to ponder something bigger than the words in my tweetdeck:

daveingland coffee…nap…coffee…nap…coffee…nap…think i’ll try coffee first, but feeling like a nap is inevitable. so glad it’s the weekend :)

@djchuang actually, i went to the 24hr safeway and picked up some tully’s coffee and brewed it home, made breakfast for my wife and i too :)

@daveingland i know i could brew at home & even taste better, but somethin still draws me to buy a cup of store-brewed coffee, what is that?

@djchuang when you go out to buy the cup of coffee, do you stay and enjoy the experience or take it to go? i’m guessing you stay there…

@djchuang i think you are a social creature and crave the experience even more than the caffeine…correct?

@daveingland yeah, I think you’re right, i do crave social settings a lot more than the average joe coffee drinker :)

[For those of you not using twitter yet, when you see "@daveingland" that is DJ sending a comment directed to me, and when you see "@djchuang" that is me sending a comment to DJ.]

So, this brings me to the point where I think about myself in contrast to DJ Chuang. He is an outtie, but I am definitely an innie. DJ is a social person and has been referred to as the greatest networking person in social media today. He likes to connect with others and share his wisdom and experiences as well as learn from too. Put him in an office cubicle for 45 hours per week and never let him leave his 5′ X 5′ space and he’d probably go crazy (of course, he always has his laptop and iphone to get by). As for me, I am the opposite. I have become very accustomed to working independently in a home office 7 days a week. I’ve done it for the past 8 years. I withdraw to the comfort of my space and enjoy the peace of being alone and working independently. I am definitely an innie.

The interesting thing about all of this is two fold: 1) How can I survive as a pastor of a church plant if I don’t crave being in front of others and enjoy being social? 2) Why do most pastors I meet tell me that they are naturally introverted and don’t like being in front of people either?

Being an introvert in ministry seems contradictory. However, it’s a contradiction that God seems to equip people with so that he can be used as a strength for pastors to connect with people more. I think it helps in that if pastors don’t crave the attention, then it will be a big help when they feel under-appreciated. It will keep them from being tempted to do things socially that probably aren’t in their best interest. It calls upon them to seek God to help them reach others, always knowing that it is God in them rather than them alone that may bring others to know the eternal love of Christ.

I don’t go to Starbucks regularly. Truth be known, they kind of intimidate me. I feel as if every time I am there people look at me and try to figure out who I am and what I am doing there, as if I just don’t fit in. I’m a fish out of water. I need to get to a place where I can connect with people and share the gospel with them through the lens of my experience and relevance. It’s not that I’m anti-social. I’m just more reserved. I need to become more of an outtie.

Social media is great and I have certainly used it to connect with others quite a bit in 2008. Now I need to take it to the streets and start sharing my passion for the local church and my love for God with those that do not know Christ or dislike the idea of church. Being called to do things that go against my natural tendencies is a very challenging place for me to be. Just like having my greatest fear of public speaking be overcome in 3 years of preaching (which seemed impossible during those early, knee-knocking, voice-crackling sermons), I need to seek and trust God to overcome this next obstacle to making myself available in more public spaces. I’ve never had a problem with connecting with others as most of my career has been in sales/marketing and leading teams of people as a manager in the corporate world. So, I know I’ll be the person God needs me to be…I’m just moving a little slowly at the moment.

Are you an innie or an outtie? Is God calling you to be an outtie instead of innie? Maybe he is calling you to be more of an innie than an outtie?

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life / ministry / people — No Comments
16
Aug 08

Need advice? Maybe a pastor isn’t the best answer

Saw a rude awakening over at Tony Morgan’s blog. He commented that in books his wife is reading regarding raising teens, that the standard advice is to get counsel from a friend, counselor, or pastor. Tony then goes on to say,

“Being a pastor, let me just say that’s about the stupidest advice a book could provide. Good counsel doesn’t come with position. Good counsel comes with experience. And, frankly, I know very few pastors that have successfully raised teenagers.”

Ouchie mama! That hurts. However, it seems to be true from my perspective too. For whatever reason it seems that a lot of pastor’s kids in their teens seem to be less-than-model teenagers. Some pastors that are parents may do the right thing yet find that kids will be kids and I am sure some pastors have raised perfect teens. However, I agree wholeheartedly that “good counsel doesn’t come with position.” This is one of the things that allows me to be me because I have lived most of my life outside of faith and outside of the church. Trust me, I’ve been through a lot can probably relate to at least 90% of the things people will come talk to me about. By no means am I an expert, but I may have been where you’re at and know what you’re going through and am committed to try and help you get through it, even if my best advice is to direct you to someone better-equipped to counsel you. Remember, just because I may know your struggle and have walked in your shoes, it may not mean I overcame it in the best of ways. In his blog post, Tony also comments:

“If you need advice, first ask the question who has walked through this same situation and come out the other side in a healthy position? Personally, I try to find coaching/counsel that’s coming out of a person’s success rather than a title behind their name.”

Again, I couldn’t agree more. Also, keep in mind that what works for some may not work for you. This is where having some good, objective counsel from people that know you well will come in handy.

Seek counsel from someone you can trust and be discerning and wise. Look to the successes others have had to give you hope and inspiration. Always remember that God provided the ultimate Counselor in Christ who is by your side and you should seek and trust His wisdom first in all things.

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Christianity / cnn.com / culture / people — No Comments
7
Aug 08

Joel Osteen’s wife causes loss of faith?!

I couldn’t believe what I read on cnn.com today (click here for the full article). A flight attendant is suing Victoria Osteen because Osteen reportedly got upset and displayed some un-Christian like actions which caused the flight attendant to lose her faith. Seriously, a jury has been selected and the case is about to start trial. Apparently it was such a serious incident that the FAA fined Victoria Osteen $3000 for interfering with a crew member.

This is a crazy story in my opinion, but it opens up the question of whether the actions of a pastor can cause someone to lose their faith? I’m sure it’s happened where a pastor does something, such as secretly takes money from the church, and then people in the church leave their faith because of it. Should our faith reside in what our pastors do? I don’t think so! That is the glorious nature of living in Christ is that we are each called to have a unique purpose and that we may enjoy a direct, eternal relationship with him. In no other faith can one be so united with their god as Christianity is with our God.

Another thing this incident brings up is that none of us are above our own actions and that everything we do will have ramifications and can potentially cause harm to another. We are called to let Christ be the light of the world through us. Pastors in-particular are viewed under greater scrutiny and we need to be aware of that. While it may not be fair, it is the way things are and when we accept the role of pastor we must accept that it comes with this additional scrutiny. Thankfully, through Christ there is grace!

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