daveingland.com

Can it just be a coincidence?

// February 11th, 2010 // 4 Comments » // God, The Latte Challenge, faith, family, friends, jesus, life

As you know by now, so much has happened in the past two months to radically turn my life upside-down. Things are coming at me from all angles and I’ve tried to do my best to discern which things were of God, which were of me, and which were from the force that I don’t want any credit given to. I’m leaving the state I grew up in for the first time in my life. For the first time in my 21 years as a father, I will be separated from my two daughters by about 700 miles and it kills me.

Through all of the things I’ve done to devote my attention to my situation, I was put on hold to pause and listen to the story of a friend. While seated at my dining table my friend talked about how tired she was. She has been in a straight commission job with a lot of expenses associated with it in an industry that has slowed way down the past 3 years. Her father-in-law is in his 80’s and he has lived with her and her husband for the past year, since her mother-in-law passed away. Her father-in-law is elderly, bitter, and full of negativity. My friend tries to please him constantly, but he’s never appreciative. She was kind of venting and I was doing my best to be there to just listen. My friend then started explaining the circumstances surrounding the passing of her mother-in-law. It came with no warning and took place in her home. Her mother-in-law wasn’t feeling well and her husband–in his usual self–said she’d be okay and that she shouldn’t go to the hospital. Well, my friend was really concerned so she took charge and said that she was going to take her to the hospital and that no one could stop her. They proceeded to walk to the front porch, when her mother-in-law paused for a moment to rest. My friend said that she saw her and saw this glowing light surrounding her. My friend asked her if she wanted to go back inside and have something to eat. Her mother-in-law said yes, that she would appreciate some food. She asked for a bowl of noodles and said she was going back upstairs to rest. My friend lovingly prepared the bowl of noodles and took it upstairs, only to find that her mother-in-law had passed away. It’s at this point that my friend tells me that she had no feeling. The only thought in her mind was how she was going to pay for her mother-in-law’s funeral since they didn’t even have money to put gas in their car? After hearing this, I just kept listening. A few days after her mother-in-law passed away my friend made a big sale and had more than enough to pay for her mother-in-law’s funeral. She was then convicted by her thoughts about finances when she should have overcome those worries and felt more compassionate or mournful.

I am reminded of my own experience with my mother. She was admitted to the hospital even though she didn’t want to go. The doctors thought she had pancreatitis. They gave her some antibiotics and my mom seemed to be recovering. For three days all she kept talking about was getting discharged so she could come home with me and eat a bowl of noodles. Every other word out of her mouth was noodles. Know that Japanese noodles are one of the most basic things I know how to cook, but one of the things that my mom appreciated most from my kitchen. She just raved about the noodle broth I made from scratch. I couldn’t wait to make her happy with some comfort food. During her last night in the hospital (The doctor was releasing her to go home the next morning) something happened and her condition got dramatically worse. She went into the ICU and two weeks later she passed away. She was diagnosed with cepsis, which is an infection in her blood stream and it is incurable. She was under heavy sedation and never was coherent during her last two weeks. It was probably the most painful experience I ever had in my life. I’m actually weeping as I type this. Not only had I lost my mother, but being raised to be an atheist and only having been able to share my belief in God and relationship with Christ for a short time before she passed away, I never heard my mom profess her faith in Christ. I had to consider the possible fact that my mom may have passed away from this life and is now eternally separated from the God I had devoted my life to. I wondered what else I could have done. I prayed and prayed and prayed that God called her to him so that we could be reunited in heaven one day. I was like a walking dead person. It was if my life had been sucked out of my body.

In the end, I never doubted God and sought comfort in his Word. I trust God completely with my life. My faith, through all that I have endured in my brief time in his kingdom, I have never wavered on that. Just as my friend had to come to terms with the fact that God will provide for her if she releases that worry to Jesus and becomes more concerned about loving others first, I learned a hard lesson as well. I have realized in the face of such tragedies as we’ve seen in Haiti and the tragedy of losing my mom unexpectedly that I have to continue to put my faith and trust in God. Whether my mom is with him or not, I have to trust that his plan is based on love, yet he is a just God and that all will have to face a final day of judgment. Deep down in my heart I do believe that God has chosen to call my entire household even if I don’t hear them verbally profess Christ as Lord and Savior. He’s given me a chance to do that in my daughters, whom I raised to atheists as well. Now as I step out in what I believe to be obedience, and move to a new state to connect with a new community of people, I have to trust that God will make a way to remove the 700 mile barrier between Beaverton, OR and Sacramento, CA so that I may one day celebrate the calling of Christ in the hearts of my daughters.

In a complicated, inner-connected tale of two people with moms that wanted noodles before they passed away, to trusting God for finances and protection when we can’t see in our human minds how it will be possible, to learning a life lesson and trying to act on it in ways with those in our families whom God has given us more time with on earth, I just can’t believe that any of this was mere coincidence. I’m believing that as frightened as I am–that I am leaving my daughters at a time when Christ’s love in me can be used to influence my daughter’s hearts–that my God is in control of all that is good and that he will make a way to see my daughters know him in their hearts, eternally. That as insane as this may seem to you(Yes, it seems insane to me too!), God is calling me to take my story and share with a community of people that don’t have neighbors or coworkers that can give such testimonies to the strength and faith and peace that can only be known in having Christ reside in our hearts. Today I’m putting my faith and trust in this promise:

“I tell you the truth,” Jesus replied, “no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.” –Mark 10:29-31 NIV

Will you stand with me and help me continue pursuing the call on my life by partnering with us in The Latte Challenge?

In the midst of Haiti, where is God?

// January 28th, 2010 // 1 Comment » // God, cnn.com, prayer

When natural disasters happen an immediate response amongst people is: Where was God? Why did he let that happen? Without getting into the theology of the question, let me just share a story with you. It goes something like this:

Blind violinist Romel Joseph laid in what he called his “grave” for 18 hours.

The concrete support beams of his music school in Haiti pinned his legs and feet. Buried in the rubble of the five-story building, Romel realized he was trapped and would not be able to get out on his own.

He was overwhelmed by the hot air. He began to have a conversation with God.

“I said, ‘I would like to know if you are here. I’m really hot … and don’t have much time to live so if you are here, I’m really hot and I need some cool air.’ And believe it or not, the next thing I know, there’s cool air that got in.”

I would have to say that this was a pretty miraculous scenario. Why of all people did Romel Joseph experience God? The simple answer is that he called out to God and found that God was there. Honestly, as someone who professes a strong faith in Christ and has been involved in pastoral ministry for the past 5 years, I don’t know if I would have the courage to get through those same 18 hours that Romel did.

The beauty of this whole experience is that Romel didn’t talk about coming clean for any sins he had committed in the past. He didn’t guilt trip himself about being in that predicament as punishment for something he did against God. He didn’t freak out and cry out for his rescue. In a simple, quiet moment in a hot, sweltering mass of rubble that entrapped his legs and made it difficult to breathe he just asked God for some cool air. He didn’t say something like, “Please save me, I don’t deserve to die.” or “I’m sorry for my sins, please forgive me and now save me.” He just simply asked for some cool air and immediately he began receiving it.

Later Romel continues to pray and ends up visualizing himself playing violin music to concertos and the peace and joy he found in those visions allowed him to get through his 18 hours of entrapment and find himself free. At the hospital being treated for his injuries, the doctors are saying that he may never play the violin again because his hand was fractured along with his legs. However, Romel just says, “I have to play so they can hear what I want them to play.”

The level of tragedy in Haiti is one that I hope we never experience again in the history of our earth. However, no matter how great I may think of myself or my ministry, I am not sure I could have had the faith that Mr. Romel Joseph displayed through his 18 hour ordeal, which I know was just an extension of his personal faith in God already. Through hearing his story via an article on CNN, the whole world now sees the beauty and peace that came upon a brave man named Romel Joseph during an incredibly trying time–a beauty and peace that came from God and is now being shared through his faithfulness. It’s not about rituals, use of holy language, or advance preparations. God will be God no matter what we think.

Mr. Joseph, it is such an honor to live on this earth with you. May your story magnify the true nature of the God of grace, peace, and love.

excerpts from cnn.com article: Trapped Violinist Found Delivered, Through Prayers and Concertos.

Dreams

// January 5th, 2010 // 4 Comments » // Dave (personal), God

I’ve never really put much focus or attention into remembering my dreams at night. However, one moment in my life 5 years ago changed that. I was at a book launching party with one of my clients in Newport Beach, CA when another guest came up and asked me–out of the blue–whether or not I believed in God. Believe it or not 5 years ago was a devout atheist, so I told her that I did not believe in God. She was taken back by my response as if she had expected me to be a believer. After her astonished stare, she told me this: “You know, sometimes God speaks to people through their dreams. He may try to speak to you through a dream.” Then she turned away and I never saw her again. It wasn’t more than 6 months later that God spoke to me through one of my dreams. There just is no other explanation. Like my friend David Meysembourg wrote in a blog post, I was just like Joe:

I was stuck in traffic one day, on my way home from work. I was listening to a radio talk show, and the guest was a rabbi who had written a book about God. A guy called in and said “Hey rabbi, I’m Joe and I’m an agnostic, and I’d like to ask you a question.”The rabbi says to Joe, “Could I ask you a question first Joe?”

Joe says “Sure”.

“Have you ever read the Bible? Torah? Koran?”

Joe says “No” to each question.

“Have you ever read any books about the Bible? Torah? Koran?”

Again, Joe says “No”.

The rabbi says, “Joe, you’re not an agnostic. You’re an ignoramus.”

I was an ignoramus! I had not read the Bible, but believed it to be false based on my ideology and the words of other atheists. I say this only to preface my dream in that I had no knowledge of people named in the Bible or events that occurred than what I heard about Adam & Eve, Noah or the nativity scene. So, one day when I’m half-awake and half-asleep, I get this dream that came to me like a vision. It was of two pieces of lumber attached at about a 45 degree angle, with the point of the angle pointing at my wife (who was laying next me) and the name Gabriel stenciled in red paint on the upper beam of wood. It only last a second. For some mysterious reason, words were put in my mouth as I woke up my wife and asked her, “Is there someone named Gabriel in the Bible?” She replied that there was, and that he was the angel that told Mary that she would give birth to Jesus. While I never could explain how that could have all transpired, I put it aside like a good atheist and went about my life as if nothing had happened. As I reflect back on that dream, I know why it came to me and who was behind it. It is a dream I recall often as it signifies a real, tangible moment that God met me where I was at and alerted me to his presence. It took several more crazy, inexplicable events like that and about 6 more months to finally get my attention, but it has been the most profound dream I have ever had. It alerted me to how dreams can have greater meaning than what we read in those books that evaluate the psychology of our dreams.

Has God shared something with you in a dream? Maybe something about this new year that you are excited about? I’d sure like to hear about it in the comment section below.

Look forward, not backward!

// October 26th, 2009 // Comments Off // God, life

One of the things on my to-do list today is to get all of my books into my new bookcase in my office. I’ve found so many books I didn’t even remember having. I came across several books I bought for my wife that are authored by Joyce Meyer. The one thing about Joyce Meyer is that she can share a thought that if we truly look at our lives in the context of what she shared, we can all have hope and over come our pasts through Christ who gives us strength.

While putting the books into the bookcase, I decided to pop open New Day New You. It’s a 365 day devotion book. I stumbled upon the devotion for October 22nd. It references 1 Corinthians 2:9:

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.

Joyce begins this devotion by writing:

Perhaps God has been speaking you about some changes in your life and you want them, but you are afraid. I want to encourage you not to be afraid to step out. Even if you make a mistake, it won’t be the end of the world.

Those are words to live by for sure. Some of us go through life so scarred from our last mistake that we are crippled to move forward. The sting still hurts and it causes us to never want to feel that pain ever again. Rather than push forward, we stay stagnant or drift backwards. Our eyes are forward, but we seem to be losing ground to our goals.

Change is a word that I have embraced often. Sometimes because I wanted to, sometimes because it was inevitable and I just had to go with it. When I seek the change and am excited by it, I run full-steam-ahead and sometimes burn myself out before realizing the goal. When change is forced on me, sometimes I respond by resisting it. No matter what we may believe at the time, the reality is that change is a good thing no matter what. We were not created to stay static, nor were we designed to live in the moment of a victory and never pushing for more. Our life is not just one moment in time. Instead, it is s journey consisting of many moments strung together to create a legacy. Our destiny is already determined, but our legacy is what we make it to be. Do we want to be remembered for past failures and shortcomings, or do we want to share in the joy of victories as we grow stronger with each passing day?

What things does God have in store for you? What is he waiting on you to see accomplished? All it takes is making that first step and leaving your fear and hurt behind you. Joyce Meyer concludes the devotion with:

You are not going to be able to everything, but step out in God’s timing into the thing you feel he is leading you into.

You can be assured in the promise from Hebrews 13:5 AMP: “I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not…”

What time is it?

// September 29th, 2009 // Comments Off // Christianity, God, faith, jesus, life

Well for me, the answer lies within the first words Jesus preached from Matthew 4:17:

From that time on Jesus began to preach, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near.”

The essence of Christian faith is grace. We learn in Ephesians 2:8, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.” With grace comes the forgiveness of Jesus for any and all things from our past. We start with a clean slate.

Repentance tends to be an evil word to those outside of the faith. It is misunderstood. I know when I was living as an atheist, I would hear people talk about repenting and seeking forgiveness, but in my mind there was nothing I felt I needed to be forgiven for. Now as a follower of Christ, there are many things I do and think about that I need to seek forgiveness for. However, repentance isn’t just about being forgiven. It goes much deeper than that. When one repents it must be a turning away from that which is wrong and then turning towards that which is right. We then must continue to deal with moving towards what is right. That is the difficult part.

When I first came to faith I made a commitment to God. In that commitment I asked for forgiveness and as a result I have never been made to feel guilty for anything from my past. All of my hurt and pain and emptiness was replaced with the grace and love of Jesus. That’s the great part! However, that’s been Jesus’ part of the commitment. He has remained true to that. My part of the commitment hasn’t been so true. I didn’t merely ask for forgiveness–instead, I made a commitment to repent.

In what others may see as a nasty word, I find beauty. When I feel the burden to turn away from doing things that I should not do, I know there is someone there to take those burdens away from me and to help guide me in the right direction. God did not create me in order to watch me fail. He reunited with me and called me into his embrace so that I could know true life. That life is filled with ups-and-downs, joy and pain, gain and loss. However, this new life I’ve been given has meaning and purpose and I need to always direct my eyes towards God and remember what he first called me to do–repent for the kingdom of heaven is near.

Repentance can seem like a scary thing. It may require us to turn away from something like causing physical harm to another human being, or it can be something as simple as being judgmental or speaking negatively about someone unjustly. No matter how big or small, turning away from something we know we shouldn’t do and honoring our commitment to then focus on doing only what we know is right is something that God requires from us. It’s our part of the commitment. If we truly believe we are in a relationship with God through Jesus, then we all know that there are two parts to any relationship.

Have you honored your part of your relationship with God lately? Not the part of doing what you feel he has called you to do or taking when he has extended his hand to you? I mean the part of your relationship where Jesus asks you to repent and come closer towards him and you look into your heart and seek to turn away from the things he wants you to.

Maybe you have felt the pain of carrying around a huge weight on your shoulders and you have not known how to be removed from it. It may be such a part of you now that you can’t imagine living a day without it being heavy on your heart. As difficult as it may be to imagine, won’t you just ask Jesus to come into your life and remove it? Nothing else has worked so far, because knowing Jesus is the only way. Know that God didn’t create you to be a table for heavy burdens. He created you to rise above all things and equipped you with the strength to get through it and to know joy through his spirit residing within you. Asking him into your heart and seeking new life may seem like a stretch of the imagination at first thought, but you’ll find that once that thought enters your mind, you won’t be able to forget about it. It eventually feels like the right thing to do. Go with it. Talk to God. Lift up your burdens to him. Tell him what you’ve been carrying around and ask him to forgive you of it and take away the pain. He will do it. In fact, he already knows about it. It’s not new news to him. However, he has not sat in judgment of you, nor will he cause you to feel guilty. He just wants you to come to know him and seek to live a new life walking together with him.

For all that Christ has done in my life, it is so easy to talk about the good things. However, it’s not so easy to talk about the bad things. As the one that has brought some bad things into my relationship with God, it is time for me to shun those things and do my best not to look to doing them again. Today is the day that I take time with God and repent from doing some things that I need to stop doing. It may cause some distance between me and some others, but it’s a small price to pay to honor my commitment to the Lord. It isn’t about guilt–it’s about God’s kindness that leads me to this place of repentance. Lord, I ask that you give me the strength to confess those things that I want to turn away from and that you give me the strength to never go back them. May it be so for all those that come to you on this day seeking your love and kindness and turning their backs on those things that need to be left in the past.